Life Keeps Changing

I know it's been a while, so this could be a long one! I have had so much going on these last few months, and I finally have a moment to catch my breath. I cannot express enough how grateful I am for the wonderful people in my world who inspire, support, and love me at my worst. They cheer me on, and are there for the joy and the pain. It is a whole new experience for me, to have people. To be at a place where healing happens, and the wall crumbles a bit to allow some light in!

For so long, I have closed the door, and kept the wall high, to protect myself (or so I thought) from getting hurt. But in doing that, I also kept myself from joy, peace, and LIFE! Who knew? I was convinced that going it alone was the best path, and that I could handle it. And you know what? That lonely, empty time, day after day, is more painful than getting hurt by another person ever was! There were some pretty dark days, sitting home alone. And I told myself that this is my life now, and that I was okay with that.  Once again, I was wrong.

Since I have moved into the new house, I am growing by leaps and bounds! I find happy within myself, and the simple things-sunrise, baking, writing...all bring so much peace. But I also find that I look forward to my visits with the neighbors and their beautiful daughter. I look forward to noise, and chaos and human contact. It is not saying that I don't still have a dark day here and there. It is saying that I choose to move forward, daily, and open my mind to the possibilities. I share my day with other humans, and it is good!

"Family". We all define that word differently. I choose to define it as people I love who love me back. People who I want in my world, who want me in theirs. And I am blessed enough to have that. I never really thought I "fit" anywhere, and so not making attachments made sense. But then, I learned. I grew. I found that it's okay to allow people to care about you. READ THAT AGAIN! It is OKAY to allow other people to care about you. That has been my BIGGEST lesson in 2020, and I cannot wait to see what comes next!

So how big is my brave, you ask?  BEYOND LIMITS!

Today I choose to be brave, bold, and hopeful! I love this crazy life of mine, and I will continue to trust in the journey, and celebrate EVERY step, not just the good ones! :)